Ask Sue – January 2010

Dear Sue,

Q.  How should we best prepare for our animals’ care if we go out of town and have to leave our animal companions at home or at a pet care facility?

A.   As soon as you begin to prepare for leaving to go on a trip out of town you should begin to communicate to your animals about what will happen with them while you are gone.  You should also communicate to them your return back home.  Remember that your animals will mirror your own emotions around leaving them, so it is important that you project confidence, safe feelings about your trip and a good feeling about the arrangements that you have made for them while you are gone.

It’s a good idea to introduce your animal companions in advance to each person that will be coming into your home in advance to care for them.  If you have to board your animal at a facility, arrange for them to visit that place at least once before your actual trip.   Put together a photo album, along with special instructions and characteristics about each of your animals so that the person caring for them will know them well and know what to expect.  Don’t be shy about telling the providers that you want them to communicate to your animals while you are gone and would appreciate hearing daily on how they are doing.

While you are on your trip, tune into your animals daily, either at the close of the day or first thing in the morning.  The way to do this would be to get in a quiet space and take out their photo or visualize them, then say their names out loud. In that moment you have then made a heart-to-heart contact with them.  Imagine that they are right in front of you and that you can feel their body and then send them a big pink bubble, filled with love and joy and surround them in this color and feeling.  This will allow your animal to feel you and know that you are all right and that, “Gosh, you didn’t drop off the face of the earth somewhere.”  In this moment, you can then remind them of when you will be returning home.  You can either state how many more days to your return, or visualize yourself coming home and walking through the door to greet them.

Communicating with your animals about your plans about being away from home and tuning into them while you are away help your animals greatly and they will acknowledge this upon your return home by exhibiting less stress and upset, making for greater harmony and balance.

Q.  Why does my cat Rickie keep killing the birds when I ask him not to and when he knows I don’t like it?

A.  What Rickie told me is that for him there is no question about doing this, it’s just in him to do, it’s how he is wired.  He really gets confused by you asking him to stop, because he feels it is part of his job and in some instances has been a special present caught especially for you.  Rickie doesn’t like it, however, when you remove the bird before he is ready, he gets upset about this.

When I asked him if he had heard your request to stop, that is where he answered back with a question, “But why?”  He did soften up a bit when I explained further how we, as humans, view birds and their seemingly unnecessary death.  There is a clash here of points of view; Rickie sees the birds as part of his very being and adventure, with no thought that he will be causing death to a bird.  It feels just like a cycle to him, all very natural.  Rickie went on to explain that this process fulfills a need for him and that there are also times where he doesn’t feel he needs to go after the birds.

I went back over the request: could he please scale his hunting down and he in turn, asked for you to give him more stimulation or action in other areas of his life.  He loves it when you talk about him, how beautiful he is and would like you to acknowledge that he is a fine hunter.  I felt that even though you don’t want him to hunt the birds, if you acknowledge to him that he is skilled at hunting, he won’t need to keep proving it to you.

Sometimes when we convey information to our animals about things we don’t want them to do, they mis-read what we have said, and it backfires.  They feel our disappointment which they interpret that they need to keep trying harder, thus providing more of what you don’t want. Rather than visualizing Rickie killing birds or feeling disappointment when he does, send him pictures and images of what you do want him to do instead, reminding him of all the things that he does do that bring you joy and happiness.

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